Hello. I figured I would post something about how I fixed this problem after wracking my brain for half of a day and to save others the same fate.
I have FIOS, and I pay for 300/300. When I replaced my old setup (Orbi RBR50) with the hEX refresh connected directly to my Verizon ONT, I noticed that my download speed was ~300Mbps, but my upload speed was anywhere from 1-6Mbps, depending on the particular speedtest.net attempt. Plug my Orbi back in, back to 300/300. Odd. I messed with every known setting you should try to get it to work, but nothing made a difference (flow control, fasttrack, firewall rules, queues, ethernet settings, the works).
While going through the WAN link’s auto-negotiation settings and trying to force 1Gbps full duplex (even though the link was coming up as that anyway), I decided to set my link speed to 100Mbps full duplex and give that a shot. Surprise, surprise, my upload speed increased dramatically…
To make a very long story short, there seems to be a problem with the hEX refresh and Verizon’s ONT (I-211M-L in my case) where they do not, in fact, auto-negotiate the link completely/correctly, even though the hEX says the link is at 1Gbps full duplex. After doing some googling, I found a lot of other people that had this type of issue, not with the hEX refresh in particular, but with routers from other vendors like Netgear, Ubiquiti, and others.
Their collective fix? Put a small unmanaged switch between the ONT and hEX refresh to force both links to come up as 1Gbps full on their own (with the help of the switch, of course, since the ONT link only works in an auto-negotiate state). In my case, I had an old T-Mobile router from 10 years ago that I booted up, disabled WiFi/DHCP on, and just used the switchports in the back as my simple, unmanaged switch. Lo and behold, I was back to getting 300/300, but this time, it was on the hEX refresh and not just my Orbi.
Hopefully this post will help someone out in the future from pulling all of their hair out. A $15 unmanaged Netgear switch is now on order, and I’ll report back with the particular model if it works as intended for this particular issue.